Parenting time & co-parenting
Schedules, exchanges, holidays, daily routines, and how decisions get made — built around a child’s actual age and stage, not a default every-other-weekend calendar.
Clarity Before Counsel
A calmer way to build
a parenting plan.
Private, out of court, and focused on your children. Angela L. Messina is a Northwestern-trained family mediator and a neutral — not an attorney, and not on anyone’s side.
Cook · DuPage · Kane · Lake · Will · virtual where appropriate
Angela L. Messina · Principal Mediator · Grounded. Disciplined. Compassionate.
Children don’t experience divorce as a legal event — they experience it as a change in trust and routine. The work is to make the next chapter orderly, respectful, and theirs.
Meet Angela
Steady in the room when things get hard.
Angela L. Messina is the Principal Mediator at Messina Mediation — the only person who conducts sessions, decides suitability, and writes what the family agreed. She holds a B.S. in Criminal Justice from Illinois State University and completed mediation training through Northwestern University.
She is not an attorney and does not practice law. She brings calm, structure, compassion, and the steady discipline of a second-degree black belt in Taekwondo to difficult family conversations. Each person may — and often should — have independent legal advice before, during, and after mediation.
Messina Mediation is a DBA of Thomas J Messina LLC. Angela remains the only mediator in the room. Practice operations do not sit in sessions and do not see private screening or caucus material.
Based in Warrenville. Serving families across Cook, DuPage, Kane, Lake, and Will counties — by referral and by appointment, in person or virtually when that is the safer or more practical format.
Children first
Child-centered — not the standard default.
Parenting plans are built to match a child’s actual age and stage. An infant’s need for consistency looks nothing like a teenager’s need for independence. Angela’s work is informed by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers’ Child-Centered Residential Guidelines. She facilitates. You decide.
Communication that stays with the parents
Logs and protocols so children are not asked to carry messages.
Neutral exchanges
Handoffs designed so kids are not caught in the middle.
Plain conversation
What is actually working, and what is not — without courtroom theater.
A child-centered path
Calmer. Clearer. Better for the children.
Messina Mediation
Child-centered, structured, private
- Space for calm, guided communication
- Workable parenting plans both people help write
- Clearer expectations for co-parenting
- Energy spent planning forward, not fighting
A more adversarial path
Positional, reactive, court-driven
- Positions often harden through filings and counsel
- Outcomes can feel imposed rather than built together
- Co-parenting may be harder after the dispute
- Time and money spent on the fight itself
Mediation is not always the right choice. Angela will say so. Attorneys remain essential: they advise each person independently, and they formalize what the family agrees.
What we help with
Private, voluntary family mediation — not a substitute for counsel.
Post-judgment family matters
Practical conversations about implementing or changing an existing arrangement, when both people can participate voluntarily and safely.
Separation logistics
Household transitions, calendars, bills, possessions, and communication — recorded as a practical understanding, not a legal settlement.
Family communication
Adult relatives, grandparents, caregiving, and recurring conflict. A structured conversation that ends in commitments the family can actually keep.
We do not calculate child support, characterize property, prepare QDROs, file pleadings, or complete court forms. Those belong with licensed professionals the family chooses independently.
Three phases, one steady path
The customer is the process — not the person who called first.
Phase 01
Screen + prepare
Each person completes a separate, confidential screening. Angela decides whether mediation can proceed safely. If it can, both people receive the same process explanation, sign the same agreement, and prepare from a shared issue list.
Phase 02
Resolve
Structured working sessions — together or, when needed, in private caucus. Angela facilitates. She does not decide the outcome, interpret the law, or tell either person what to accept.
Phase 03
Document
If you reach understandings, Angela prepares a nonbinding memorandum of what you agreed. Independent counsel reviews it. The practice does not file court documents, draft pleadings, or give legal advice.
How a Clarity Call works
- 1. One person sends a short invite — names, contacts, category. No accusation box.
- 2. Both people receive the same plain-language explanation.
- 3. Each person completes a private screening. Those answers are not shared with the other person.
- 4. Angela decides suitability. If the matter proceeds, both sign the same agreement and fee terms.
What guides every session
Fairness
The same process for both people. No one becomes Angela’s client because they called first or paid first.
Clarity
Agendas, issue lists, and plain language — so the conversation stays organized even when the feelings are not.
Privacy
Mediation communications are handled under the Illinois Uniform Mediation Act and your signed agreement. Limits are stated, not promised away.
Your decision
You decide whether to agree, and on what terms. Angela does not make parenting-time determinations for you.
When mediation is not the right choice
Angela will decline a matter that is not safe or not voluntary.
Every participant completes a separate confidential screening before a joint session. Angela will decline, suspend, or terminate when coercion, fear, domestic violence, threats, stalking, child-safety issues, severe impairment, or an unmanageable power imbalance would prevent meaningful self-determination.
Declining an unsuitable matter is a quality outcome — not a failure of the practice. If mediation can proceed only with safeguards (shorter sessions, separate rooms, counsel present, remote controls), those conditions are set before anyone sits down.
If you are in immediate danger, call 911. Illinois Domestic Violence Helpline 1-877-863-6338. National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233. This website is not a crisis service.
Fees
Clarity without a promise that you will reach agreement.
The first step is paid Readiness & Screening — the same process for both people. It is not a free private consult with whoever writes first. Screening is paid even when a matter is not suitable. Additional time is billed in planned blocks at $225–$300 per hour.
Readiness & screening
$225–$350
Per family. Credited toward a package if the matter is accepted.
- Process orientation for both people
- Two separate confidential screenings
- Conflict check and suitability decision
- Paid even if mediation does not proceed
Focused mediation
$950–$1,250
A contained set of issues, with a defined number of hours.
- Readiness & screening included
- Up to 3 mediation hours
- Approved nonbinding mediator summary
- Equal fee split unless you jointly direct otherwise
Parenting pathway
$1,850–$2,500
For families building a fuller parenting plan.
- Readiness & screening included
- Up to 6 mediation hours
- Issue checklist and summary
- One revision for factual accuracy
For attorneys & referral partners
Prepared participants. A neutral process. Independent counsel retained by each family.
Families are served across Cook, DuPage, Kane, Lake, Will, with virtual sessions where that is appropriate. There is no referral fee tied to legal work. Both people keep their own choice of lawyer.
CookDuPageKaneLakeWill
“She doesn’t rush people past their pain to get to a signature. She listens until the noise settles, and then she helps them see what actually matters — usually their kids.”
Clarity Call
Start Readiness & Screening — the same process for both people.
Use this form to invite mediation. Do not put the story of the dispute here. If there is a safety concern, say so — Angela will contact you privately. Both people must opt in before any joint session is scheduled.
- This is not a free private consult with whoever writes first.
- Angela represents neither participant.
- This material is general education, not legal advice. Angela Messina is a neutral mediator and is not an attorney for either participant.
- Please never email sensitive information to [email protected].